Lamentations: The Book of Jeff

The following Bible verse is referenced on the strap of Jeff Francoeur's left hand batting glove:

"Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go." -- Joshua 1:9

Perhaps a more apposite Biblical reference for Jeff to cite would be Job 1:21:

"And said, Naked came I out of my mother's womb, and naked shall I return thither: the LORD gave, and the LORD hath taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD."

In fairness to the Sports Illustrated cover on your right, the writer does characterize Francoeur's torrid 2005 start as "impossibly hot", and he posits a fascinating metaphysical-existential intangible: Can Anyone Be This Good?

The answer, of course, is yes, anyone can be that good after 46 at bats in 15 games in the month of July. What separates the SI piece from the one you are currently ogling at is this: the former is a hagiography; the latter, a modern day jeremiad.

As such, I will not spare you the agonizing particulars. The story of Jeff Francoeur is not one that begins in the backyard and just gets better and better. It is a story that ends in Gwinnett County, Georgia, where the Lord will most certainly be accompanying Jeff as he makes his way back down to Triple-A for some much-needed remedial inculcation. Mr. Francoeur is not a Job figure in the same way that he is not particularly strong or courageous at the plate in the face of the many tests God throws Jeff's way (i.e. anything outside God's Green Strike Zone). In an ESPN article last month, Jeff had this perspicacious observation on the subject of on-base percentage to share with ESPN's Jerry Crasnick: "If on-base percentage is so important, then why don't they put it up on the scoreboard?" Francoeur says. Herein lies the locus of our lamentation.

Jeff Francoeur was something of a scout's darling. Big. Athletic. He could field. He could throw. He could hit for power. He could marry your sister. By the age of twenty, Francoeur was named the top prospect in the Braves organization by the purveyors of purity and probity, Baseball America. As the automaton composing this post has observed, scouting requires human evaluation and, consequently, is subject to human error. Francoeur was plucked out of Double-A ball in 2005 and promoted to the Braves starting lineup. In just over 100 games in Double-A, Jeff rendered an oddly unimpressive, if portentous line of .260/.296/.460 -- my sincerest apologies to my readers for posting a stat seldom seen on specious scoreboards. Jeff Francoeur has never lied to us; he is, after all, a God-fearing man. The signs were there. After a blistering July, Francoeur would cool off by September, posting an OPS of .739, a mark eerily similar to his career total of .735 -- egad! If Jeff's first full season playing at the Major League level looks familiar to you -- .260/.293/.449 -- then you have done a yeoman's job in reading this paragraph. No, then, Francoeur was not a mere gentile like Job; he was a prophet like Jeremiah. Jeff was a radical truth-teller not seen since the days of John the Baptist; and like John, he was sniped by his own acolytes portraying him as the savior of the crumbling Braves empire.

All right, enough hokum. No more blithe interpolation of mysticism within the solemn, sacred screeds of statistical certitude. The year is 2009 A.D., and Jeff Francoeur, coming off the worst year of his career in 2008, is currently on pace to eclipse that execrable year with one even more foul. His current OPS of .615 is 38 points lower than his '08 effort, in which he posted a VORP of -17.8 runs, according to the infallible robots, the custodians of stats not appearing on a scoreboard near you, Baseball Prospectus. In short, the Braves could trot out maligned-former-Giant-man Tsuyoshi Shinjo and fare better than Francoeur did last year or this year.

Making matters worse is the marked decline in his once lauded defensive play. According to FanGraphs, Frenchy posted an Ultimate Zone Rating of -4.9 in 2008 and is on pace to post one of -9.9 in the current year of his Lord, 2009. The Lord hath taken the skills wrought with honest hands and placed them in the care of one Adam Jones; or the prophet, Elijah Dukes; or Nate "the great" McLouth et al. The intrepid Frenchy braved his trials and tribulations head on, even posting a career-high walk rate of 6.1 percent during his star-crossed 2008 campaign. This year he seems to have thrown in the towel, similar to Job's resignation of his fate. Jeff and his numbers, however, never lied. He was never destined to fulfill any prophecy. Propped up by sycophants, scouts, and sportswriters across this intestate land, Jeff remained steadfastly committed to hacking at slop and refusing to take walks like a dispassionate robot might do. The prodigal son egresses from the outfield, his angels patiently awaiting his rapturous return to the minor leagues.

Semper Fidelis